A long day

Today was my first fourteen hours day ever. The first in a business setting. It wasn't fourteen hours of work straight. I was assisting in a long meeting, that finished with a dinner in a nice restaurant. And, the end of my undergradute degree getting closer, I have had the opportunity for much thought.

Let me try to explain the reason behind this meeting. I work for the National Academies, being a member of staff. The academies function in departments and boards, each doing research influencing policies in a very wide array of fields, ranging from manufacturing, where I am, to the constructed environment and infrastructure, where I also work, to education, medicine, astronomy, energy, and more, much more. Staff work at the NAS (National Academy of Sciences, the old name for the academies, from before the inclusion of engineering and medicine) building every day. Each board has a certain number of employees but they rarely exceed ten. These employees are a support group for the panels of experts the academies convene. The board on manufacturing and engineering design has two heads; one of staff, my boss, and one being chair of a group of experts. These experts meet twice a year, and talk about the direction of manufacturing in the country, and try to see how they can change it. They decide to do studies, which the staff have to make possible; these studies are funded by sponsors, like the Department of Defense. The staff do the research and the dirty work, while the board with the guidance of the director of staff appoints a committee of experts to work on the issue.
For example, we are currently doing work on a currency study. How can currency stay ahead of manufacturers? It seems like paper money is coming to an end. What can come next? The board decided to do this study, because they knew they could get a sponsor, the department of treasury. A committee of experts was appointed, and now people like me look through mountains of data to find what the committee should read. The committee will write the report with the help of staff, and will sign it.
Alright, that was meant to be a brief overview of the process. It is important to understand that the Academies are very prestigious. It is a great honour to be asked to be a board member, or a committee member. Contributors that excel in their field have a chance to be appointed the National Academies; they then become a member of the Academies (distinction, this is different from being a board or committee member). Of the 1500+ members, 170 are nobel prize winners. To be part of the NAS is probably one of the highest accolade one can receive.

All this to say that today, I was sitting on the Board of Manufacturing and Engineering Design board meeting, and that the people there were of a very high caliber. Because of the nature of manufacturing, out of 25 members, there were only about five from academia. These consisted of professors leading research centres, of deans, and of other high positions. There was a high ranking official from a trade union. Among industries, the Chair was vice-president of Boeing, the others were a mixture of CEOs, directors, or retired CEOs and directors. And me.

I was sitting behind the table, observing them all, listening to what they had to say. After the day's work was over, I had a few drinks with them, and we went for dinner to a fancy French restaurant. I got to know them. I got to see what the highly successful in different paths become. Well, I am having doubts. Their lives seem pointless to me: ridiculous, pretentious, arrogant, humiliating, servile, glorified, inflated, long, slow. Oh yes, they are recognised, in demand, important, rich, but what have they done? What gives their lives any meaning? What makes them happy to wake up every morning? What allows them to justify their slavery? I spoke to one of the retirees. He enjoyed what he was doing, but only since he'd retired. Since then, he could pick and choose. He had been one of the successful ones, and in retirement, he was needed. He liked choosing. But how long did it take him to reach pseudo-retirement? Fourty long years, it seems.

And where am I now? The corporate road promises long hours, good pay, recognition, and power. Slavery, greed, pride, and gluttony. With all the food served today, I doubt that I could ever stay thin on that road.

The academic road promises security, acceptable pay, peer recognition, and influence. Slavery, greed, pride and gluttony. Only in different proportions.

There were other paths on display; that of the researcher. I shiver at the mere thought. That of the union leader. What I saw there was a man always fighting, always ready to pick a fight, and interpreting everything as an invite to fight. An intelligent man for sure, a man with real responsibilities, making a real difference, but changed by his role into a pink angry balloon. And then, that of the staff members, the behind-the-scene role. That of staff. To illustrate how absurd this one is, let me tell you about Marta: religious, conservative, doesn't want to move away from DC, ever, doesn't want to work in industry, doesn't want to work in academia, two years out of college-- ready to quit her job, bored as she is, in a position that fits her perfectly. Or that of another colleague, Mike Cohn-- old, with yellow-teeth, he appears ancient, with his bent back, his slow walk, and his montone voice. He loves speaking to me, loves to get some interaction. But fourty years in policy think tanks have taken their tole; a man can work slowly, sure. But it'll make him go slow too.

So I ask: here are men that are leaders in their fields, that are recognised worldwide, published, followed, listened to, and looked up to. Am I missing something? Is there a dimension I have added to life, one that doesn't really exist, or one that they have forgotten?

I put this up on the internet, because I would like to invite comments. Some of you have chosen a path. Some are in the process of choosing one. Tell me why, please.